Dear TEB Team,

"I’m pregnant and already feeling stretched thin. With the holidays around the corner, I’m dreading the constant questions about my pregnancy, the unsolicited advice, and the expectation to host or participate in everything. How do I prioritize myself without guilt?"

"I’m navigating postpartum recovery and the holidays at the same time. My partner’s family wants to come stay with us for a week, but I’m not sure I’m up for it. How do I gently set limits and still keep the peace?"

"I’m newly postpartum, and while I want to join my family for the holidays, the thought of a long car ride, noisy gatherings, and passing my baby around feels overwhelming. How can I balance my needs with everyone’s expectations?"

Dear Readers,
First, let me say — obviously, you’re not alone in feeling this way. The holidays can be overwhelming in the best of times, and pregnancy or postpartum adds an extra layer of complexity. You’re navigating a significant life transition, and it’s important to prioritize your needs and well-being, even if it means making adjustments to your usual traditions.

Here’s how you can set boundaries, honor your energy, and truly enjoy this season on your terms.

1. Practice the Art of “No, Thank You”

It’s okay to say no — to an event, to a dish, or to unsolicited advice. A simple, “No, thank you” is a complete sentence. You don’t owe anyone a detailed explanation for prioritizing your peace.

2. Protect Your Mental, Emotional, and Physical Energy

Feeling overwhelmed? It’s okay to opt out of a gathering altogether—or leave early if you need to. The people who love you will understand, and your well-being should always come first.

3. Set Clear Visiting Limits

Hosting visitors this year? That’s wonderful — but it’s okay to draw a line. Let guests know ahead of time how long you’re available or when you’ll need to rest. A kind but firm, “We’ve loved having you, thank you so much for coming, but it’s time for us to rest now,” works perfectly.

4. Pass the Hosting Torch

If the idea of hosting feels like too much this year, give yourself permission to step back. Let someone else take on the role — you deserve a break, and the holidays are about connection, not perfection.

5. Ask for What You Need

Need a quiet space to nurse? A more comfortable seat? A plate made for you before the buffet rush? Get ahead of the considerations if you can — and don't hesitate to address them directly in the moment as they may arise! Most people are happy to help — they just need to know how.

6. Skip Traditions That Don’t Serve You

You don’t have to bake the cookies, participate in the gift exchange, or referee the family game night if it feels like too much. Traditions are meant to bring joy, not stress, and it’s okay to press pause on anything that doesn’t feel right this year.

7. Say No to Unwanted Touch

Not up for hugs, belly rubs, or baby cuddles? Set a boundary early on: “We’re keeping things hands-off this year.” Boundaries are a gift to yourself (and can be a great example and "aha moment" to others who may realize they can and/or need to set their own).

8. Decline Unnecessary Travel

If long trips feel too exhausting, give yourself permission to say no. Pregnancy and postpartum are taxing on the body, and your health takes priority over any travel plans. Plus in the age of FaceTime and Zoom — there are many ways we can still share meaningful space through digital tools.

9. Give Yourself Grace

This season may not look like it has in years past, and that’s okay. Celebrate what feels good, let go of what doesn’t, and trust that you’re doing enough — because you are.

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The holidays don’t have to be a time of overwhelm. By setting boundaries and honoring your needs, you can create a season that’s meaningful, joyful, and restorative.

Have a question about navigating the holidays during pregnancy or postpartum? Share it with us — we’d love to help. And if you’ve already set some boundaries or made adjustments, let us know what’s working for you in the comments!